People mature to a certain level rather than profoundly change. It is like planting a tomato seed. The seed grows, eventually, reaching maturity. While in this process, the tomato doesn’t change into another kind of fruit or a rose.
All of us have certain and important karmic predispositions. Add to this, the first seven or eight years of our life in which nature fast tracks us to learn a language and the basics of a particular culture. All this is difficult to change especially if there has been child abuse. And likely we will never change very much although we imagine otherwise.
In spite of this, we have the potential to reach a high degree of maturity which involves education; not just K12 or a university education, but also a life education, the so-called college of hard knocks in which we experience new things which make up our life education.
The real danger for us lies in trying to change what cannot be changed, except very little, and failing to mature what can be matured over time in which we come to know more about the world around us and more about ourselves as psychological and spiritual beings which is what Buddhism teaches us.
But I dare say, not everyone is interested in Buddhism’s ability to mature the individual. The popular alternative, which sometimes finds itself embedded in Zen, is just to learn how to enjoy life moment by moment and day by day. And so one never actually matures. This lifestyle is done in the interest of personal freedom with a minimum of personal responsibility. Eventually, however, the future catches up with these individuals who have followed the way of immediate gratification.
Eventually, they become aware—maybe in their 50s or 60s—that life really is finite and the body they’ve inhabited for all these years is growing older and will not be around for them very much longer. Faced with this doom they become resentful towards Buddhism for its “I told you so” and some seem to adhere even more to materialism that after I die, that’s it. There is no rebirth.
What do you say to these people? You can’t say much. Why bother? There are other people who have an open mind who are open to the belief that life goes on after death; that our journey doesn’t end with this life. Life is a great learning curve for many people and a vicious circle for others who refuse to reach full maturity by awakening to their undying, true nature which Buddhism teaches.
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